Have you ever wondered why you never have enough money? More than likely you’ve blamed it on your spending habits or lack of income coming in. But did you know that if you don’t tackle this one thing you will never have enough money? How we handle this one thing regarding money can affect our relationships, our health, our dreams, our children, and future opportunities. This week’s book of the week is Worth It by Amanda Steinberg, founder and CEO of Dailyworth.com. In Amanda’s book she addresses the stress that money or lack of money can have on us and how to solve your money problems at the root.
“Money doesn’t have to be the source of so much anxiety or stress. It can also be a source of freedom, power, and choices in our lives. This can be true regardless of our financial circumstances – whether we have $100,000 in debt or $1,000,000 in the bank. It is not just about how much you have or don’t have. It all depends on how you handle it. Curveballs in life (children, divorce, death, lay-offs, moving) are constant, but the way you position yourself to catch those curveballs can be strategic and consistent. You’ll be fine. If you have a healthy money story and if you’re not afraid to engage.”¹
It goes way beyond discipline and habits. First you have to start with your story. This was an epiphany for me this morning. I wrote down, “Your shame story around money will cause you to perpetually fail when it comes to money. Stop the shame story.” This thought reminded me of an earlier article I wrote while reading Brené Brown’s Book Dare to Lead, called “Shame Off You.” Brené talks about how our shame stories affect us. They effect our behaviors and our decisions. And they sure as heck can effect the way we deal with money. If you’ve ever experienced this you are not alone, you are just alive and breathing. As Brene says, “…the fear of vulnerability and all that comes with taking off the armor-fear of being judged or misunderstood, of making a mistake, being wrong, and experiencing shame – is universal.”²
So the actions we usually take is to push away or hide the shame. As Amanda Steinberg states in her book Worth It, “It’s ironic that turning off the part of our brains that thinks about money makes us feel better. And that mishandling our money and putting ourselves in harm’s way seems more satisfying than opening our statements, looking at our options, and really seeing where we are.”³ It’s a coping skill we’ve learned over the years. Now it’s time to unlearn those behaviors and let go of the shame.
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Vigilant Poster Girl